The new moon is among us, and for me, reading into a bit of an explanation into what is going on Astrologically has been relieving. Perhaps you’re rolling your eyes at the thought of Astrology, but I heard a comparison today that made complete sense as to why reading what’s going on in the stars can benefit us. Cassandra Bodzak (here you can RSVP for her free/donation based workshop and meditation,) compared it to the weather report. Basically you can turn on the weather report and know it will rain and be prepared, or it can catch you by surprise. Tuning into what is in play in the stars can set you at ease because you know you’re not alone in what you’re feeling. You can honour the times you need space, respect when communication perhaps isn’t totally clear, or answer the opportunity your gut is yelling at you to take.
Of course its not a science, and it was always something I thought was just “fun,” but nothing I ever followed seriously. Not until I read into Mercury Retrograde and everything it did. It eerily portrayed my life at the time and now I am seeing how karmic circles are playing out. I’m reading that the events that have happened in my past are coming to a close now. That they had a divine meaning in it all, and have lead me to where I am right now. Which I think is really friggin awesome!
What really has resonated with me about this New Moon in Gemini is finding our truths are really high-lighted. With Gemini being the ruler of self-expression and the throat chakra we are inspired to speak how we truly feel. Mercury has just gone straight again, and everything that was exposed while it was in retrograde is coming into play here. Its exposed pieces of the past, things we need to let go of, things that are no longer serving us, especially in relationships, finances, ours truths and careers.
This couldn’t be more spot on for me.
I’m saying goodbye to the word fashion blogger. Its been a short, although fun ride. Perhaps most of you didn’t even know, or see me as one anyway.
I did it because I was curious. I was interested. It was fun. I love to dress up, feel pretty, furry vests and flowing frocks.
I did it because I was afraid.
Afraid people would laugh. My ego tried to warn me, “You’ll look dumb,” it said. So I went for it anyway.
And now that I have decided to ‘quit’ per say; not dressing up oh no. I love fashion and it will always be a part of me, just quit the rat race of the f-blogging world. The desire for the latest trends, the greatest accessories. The best purses and shiniest time pieces. I’ve quit because I got a call again. A call to do what I was doing all along. And now reading into what is going on in the stars I feel 100% supported in this decision. It is no accident I awoke one morning to the voice of my Inner Guide, that voice inside my head, the one akin to a Mother’s voice, so reassuring and calm saying ” You know your purpose, you know what to do. You can quit asking. Find your True North again and just Go. For. It.”
Ego tried to call me a fraud.
It laughed at me for trying.
I was dumb.
What a waste, it said. Of time. Of Money.
But on my mat. My Guide said otherwise.
“But darling, it was FUN. You enjoyed something you were curious about. And in the end, you found something you weren’t and confirmed what you were. You let go of fear. You embraced something new. You solidified your love of fashion, but just not talking about it; the world of convincing people they need something.
“When really you’re about the business of convincing people they have everything they need right there inside of them.
“Embrace the beauty, but answer the call knocking on your door. Swing it open, shut your eyes, and jump in with both feet.”
Breathe in. Breathe out.
And so it is.
Wishing you all the blessings that come with the New Moon. Take time to make space for yourself tonight. Light a candle, drum up some dreams; if something has been eating at you, begging to be released, its because its supposed to be. Go for it, the stars are on your side.
here you can read more about the New Moon in Gemini.
I went for a bike ride today as my daily exercise (because I kind of loathe the gym.) In fact I have been walking almost daily, for the past week. I forgot how much I love going for walks, whether it be to somewhere or just for leisure. As I rode, the pedals going up, down, up, down, grinning ear to ear, head swaying left to right as I scanned the beautiful road-way, smelling sage and sweetgrass, the last of the lilacs, the beginning of the cotton woods releasing the white fluff into the air, I had to ask myself; Why don’t I do this more often?
I feel like a lot of us do that. My mum quit painting ages ago despite loving it. I know dads that quit playing guitar and sports. And instead we fill our days with errands and tasks and kid stuff and more errands that all it seems we make time for is television, or something that requires no energy and its a bloody shame.
I went for coffee with a good friend and when she asked me what I’ve been up to, I shrugged, “the usual,” I said. “Kid stuff, house stuff, blogging and yoga, gardening…” I paused. “taking naps,” and she laughed.
“Oh good, its not just me!” she says. “Thats kind of refreshing, it seems everyone I talk to when I ask that question they answer with ‘busy. I’m busy, just so so busy.’ Why is everyone so busy?!” she said throwing her hands up. “When did busy become a badge of honour?”
Now I laughed. I only laughed because what she said is true, and once upon a time I wore it like a badge of honour too.
For one, I really just didn’t know what else to say. I suppose I wanted to seem like I was doing something interesting, when really I was doing the usual. Work, eat, sleep, repeat.
It was after having Mila and attempting to go back to work and everything else I did before kids, getting pregnant again in the midst and having my world turn upside down, I realized, ‘hey all this busyness sucks.’
So I cut my schedule down to nothing and started over.
Now I’m almost always free. My schedule is loosely planned, I can fit anyone in for coffee. I spend a lot of time alone with the kids, floating from one task to the next. Hitting up the odd play group, appointment, Calgary trip. I’m really really un-busy and its kind of fucking awesome.
I’m not trying to make motherhood and homemaking a cake walk- it isn’t. It is stressful and it is a 24/7 gig. But it is because of these factors, I simplified it to this point so it is enjoyable. Before, for me, it wasn’t. I have also decided to spend my time more wisely, doing things I love, instead of spending my time on things I don’t enjoy.
No, I can’t spend my days skipping down a wildflower path, but I sure can walk to do my errands. House work is always there, its endless, theres a time and a place for that, but its not during Nap Time. I always, always spend the kids’ nap time doing something quiet, gentle and restful for myself. It is my time to ‘just be.’ When they wake, I wake, we work together. The errands are done over the span of the week. The laundry piles and is done in one day, usually after Justin complains of no socks, or Mila runs out of dresses. Toys are picked up periodically throughout the day and entirely before bed, everyone helps. The rest of our time, are just moments strung together that make up a day, broken up by meals and snuggles, tasks, reading and naps.
Perhaps not everyone can cut their schedule down to what mine is, but I encourage you to take a look at it, and see if you can in fact take more time to do something you love. You are not meant to work and work and work and work to pay for a vacation once a year so you can attempt to recover from working yourself into the ground. Life is meant to be enjoyed. There is beauty and simplicity all around you if you choose to see it and allow yourself a break amongst the chaos. I encourage you to join me in my #findingbeautymovement. Share with me your moments, the ones you that really speak to you. Share them so that they may inspire someone else to see the beauty in their life too.
Sending beautiful vibes your way, dear reader.